Okay, so I have now officially read all the books (aside from that dumb Bree Tanner book that I've decided I'm not bothering with because it'll be just as pointless as Breaking Dawn) and you know what? My opinion hasn't changed. This is still a HORRIBLE series. Even if you lower your standards and look at it as a guilty pleasure book, it's horrible.
There literally is nothing redeemable about it. The writing is bad. The story is bad. The characters are bad. It's just...bad. Not to mention pointless, sexist (to both men AND women), anti-feminist, slightly racist, encourages shallowness, and basically seems to say "you are not complete without a man". Oh, it's also reeks of ignorance and classism (which for those that don't know, is when you look poorly on being lower class and favor being rich). It also has lazy writing, the author didn't do any research whatsoever, and also feels like the author actually thinks she's writing steller literature instead of a cheesy teen vampire novel.
Now, if you are a fan of this and just enjoy it as a cheesy vampire novel and don't actually think it's uber spectacular then great. I have no business with you. I myself enjoy many a book that is maybe not the greatest so carry on. My issue is with the people who honestly and truly think this book is like the best book ever and go around calling it amazing. No. Just...NO. This is not amazing by any stretch of the imagination.
The fact that this series has become so beloved and a world wide bestseller and called the next Harry Potter (I HATE that especially) astounds me. It really is proof that just because something sells well doesn't mean it's good. So there. It's a horrible horrible series and I'm glad I'm finally done with it. This blog is basically finished aside from the editing I'm going to do with previous posts (I've seen a few typos, sorry about that) and coming lists. The lists will be as follows:
One Hundred Reasons Why Twilight is a Horrible series-This is self explanatory and will compile all the reasons I found during my reading of the series.
Fifty Reasons Why Harry Potter is Better the Twilight-I HATE that people have had the nerve to imply Twilight is better then Harry Potter. This list will go into detail about why that simply isn't so.
Books That Have Gotten a Unfair Rep Due to Twilight-Like it or not, Twilight has had an effect on publishing. Particularly regarding book's reputations. Some books have been unfairly labled as Twilight rip-offs or as bad as by Twilight fans and anti's alike and I want to shed some light on these books because I do think this is an unfair thing, although I have been admittedly guilty of it myself (I'm sorry Mortal Instruments! Really, I am!).
After those, this blog will be done and left alone for anyone's enjoyment.
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
BREAKING DAWN: Chapter 39-The Happily Ever After
CHAPTER SUMMARY: This stupid, long, and utterly pointless book FINALLY ends. The title of the chapter pretty much sums this up.
NOTES/THOUGHTS/REACTIONS:
Lots of rambling about vampires leaving. Don't care.
Lots of gloating about how awesome Bella was. REALLY don't care.
Talk with Alice. Don't care.
Talk with Jasper about Jenks. Don't care.
Talk about new guy possibly having a thing for Renesmee and causing problems later on. REALLY don't care (and again: I REALLY hope Meyer doesn't write a book about this in the future)
Edward and Bella coo at each other. REALLY don't care.
The end.
THIS IS THE STUPIDEST BOOK EVER.
WORD LIST: none
GENERAL ANNOYANCES: why was the book even written?
NOTES/THOUGHTS/REACTIONS:
Lots of rambling about vampires leaving. Don't care.
Lots of gloating about how awesome Bella was. REALLY don't care.
Talk with Alice. Don't care.
Talk with Jasper about Jenks. Don't care.
Talk about new guy possibly having a thing for Renesmee and causing problems later on. REALLY don't care (and again: I REALLY hope Meyer doesn't write a book about this in the future)
Edward and Bella coo at each other. REALLY don't care.
The end.
THIS IS THE STUPIDEST BOOK EVER.
WORD LIST: none
GENERAL ANNOYANCES: why was the book even written?
BREAKING DAWN: Chapter 38-Power
CHAPTER SUMMARY: There's a lot of talking and a very short anti-climatic ending as the Volturi leave. Lamest battle, EVER.
NOTES/THOUGHTS/REACTIONS:
I literally don't care about any of this at this point. It's painfully obvious Meyer isn't going to kill anyone important, that the Cullens will live, and it'll be very boring and all of this boring exposition was just leading up to a boring and stupid ending. But Meyer does try a bit to get us excited I guess.
We open with the fight still going on. If one can call vampires pummeling Bella's Mary Sue love shield a fight. Basically all the Volturi try to break through Bella's shield and naturally fail because as Meyer states time and time again: Bella is awesome. Never mind that she suddenly knows how to use this gift at will when before she had trouble. Whatever, right? She's protecting everyone!
Then just as it looks like there's FINALLY going to be a fight. Aro goes "lets vote! Cause it'd be a shame to kill everyone of these people!" Seriously? Who the hell does that in the middle of an impending battle? This is so stupid I don't know where to begin so I'll move on. Then it's a rehash of the same old arguements that oh yeah, were told to us LAST CHAPTER. Stop freaking repeating yourself Meyer, I understand everyone's motivations at this point (even if those motivations make no real sense) MOVE ON WITH THE PLOT. If one can call this a plot.
Then Edward steps forward and of course is all reasonable and oh hello, turns out Renesmee is NOT the first of her kind. Suddenly new guy shows up and hey he was born the same way. Isn't it convenient how no one discovered him before this and he just happened to show up on time? Give me a break. Oh, he's also beautiful and it's hinted further on that he may try something with Renesmee later on. Great. I forsee a sequel involving Renesmee, this guy, and Jacob and because it's Meyer she'll probably go for the sexy white vampire instead of the guy who's been there for her all her life. I hope I'm wrong and that Meyer doesn't do this, but I have a feeling when her next books don't make much more money, this will be the route she goes. Oh, and in case you care, he's there because Alice and Jasper somehow conviently found him in time and hey! they're back!
Of course, we get the lame backstory of the new guy and it's just as absurd and awfully convenient as the rest of this book. I'll spare you details, mostly because I was yawning through it and wanted the battle to resume. Of course, I'm disappointed as the story manages to convince the Volturi to not attack. Stupid speech by Aro and suddenly they're all gone. LAME. Seriously, most anti-climatic thing I've ever read in my life. I've read FANFICTION that is better then this crap!
Much cliche celebrating is to be had after they leave. Boring chapter ends. One more chapter to go! THANK GOD.
WORD LIST: crux, exultantly
GENERAL ANNOYANCES: Lamest. Battle. EVER.
NOTES/THOUGHTS/REACTIONS:
I literally don't care about any of this at this point. It's painfully obvious Meyer isn't going to kill anyone important, that the Cullens will live, and it'll be very boring and all of this boring exposition was just leading up to a boring and stupid ending. But Meyer does try a bit to get us excited I guess.
We open with the fight still going on. If one can call vampires pummeling Bella's Mary Sue love shield a fight. Basically all the Volturi try to break through Bella's shield and naturally fail because as Meyer states time and time again: Bella is awesome. Never mind that she suddenly knows how to use this gift at will when before she had trouble. Whatever, right? She's protecting everyone!
Then just as it looks like there's FINALLY going to be a fight. Aro goes "lets vote! Cause it'd be a shame to kill everyone of these people!" Seriously? Who the hell does that in the middle of an impending battle? This is so stupid I don't know where to begin so I'll move on. Then it's a rehash of the same old arguements that oh yeah, were told to us LAST CHAPTER. Stop freaking repeating yourself Meyer, I understand everyone's motivations at this point (even if those motivations make no real sense) MOVE ON WITH THE PLOT. If one can call this a plot.
Then Edward steps forward and of course is all reasonable and oh hello, turns out Renesmee is NOT the first of her kind. Suddenly new guy shows up and hey he was born the same way. Isn't it convenient how no one discovered him before this and he just happened to show up on time? Give me a break. Oh, he's also beautiful and it's hinted further on that he may try something with Renesmee later on. Great. I forsee a sequel involving Renesmee, this guy, and Jacob and because it's Meyer she'll probably go for the sexy white vampire instead of the guy who's been there for her all her life. I hope I'm wrong and that Meyer doesn't do this, but I have a feeling when her next books don't make much more money, this will be the route she goes. Oh, and in case you care, he's there because Alice and Jasper somehow conviently found him in time and hey! they're back!
Of course, we get the lame backstory of the new guy and it's just as absurd and awfully convenient as the rest of this book. I'll spare you details, mostly because I was yawning through it and wanted the battle to resume. Of course, I'm disappointed as the story manages to convince the Volturi to not attack. Stupid speech by Aro and suddenly they're all gone. LAME. Seriously, most anti-climatic thing I've ever read in my life. I've read FANFICTION that is better then this crap!
Much cliche celebrating is to be had after they leave. Boring chapter ends. One more chapter to go! THANK GOD.
WORD LIST: crux, exultantly
GENERAL ANNOYANCES: Lamest. Battle. EVER.
Sunday, December 19, 2010
BREAKING DAWN: Chapter 37-Contrivances
CHAPTER SUMMARY: More talking that is basically the Volturi stating how awesome Renesmee is.
NOTES/THOUGHTS/REACTIONS:
So now that Aro is Team Renesmee he does his best to get all the other Volturi on Team Renesmee as well. Lots of dissention fom mainly Caius who is obviously the one we're not supposed to like. He then points out the Cullen's alliance with the wolves. Good point. But then Meyer drops the bomb: they aren't actually werewolves, guys, they're shifters! What? Now Meyer isn't even trying. I can picture exactly how she's wrote this in her head:
"hmm...the alliance with the werewolves is a problem though...oh, I know! I'll make them NOT werewolves but shifters! That's so much cooler then werewolves! Oh, wait what if my fans question it? Oh, I'll put in this explanation of that their brains just decided on wolves so they've always been wolves! My fans will buy that. They've bought all my other stuff, haven't they?"
I'm telling you, that's how she wrote this whole damn book. She didn't care one lick about making it actually GOOD. She just cared about getting it done and getting more money for it. Yet people accuse JK ROWLING of being the greedy one. Rowling actually cared about writing decent material. Also Rowling donates millions of dollars to charity per year (I have yet to hear of Meyer donating to actual charities that didn't include her friends or that involved promoting her books). Rowling has written charity books that she made no money off of (that Bree Tanner book Meyer made money off of. Red Cross only got a dollar a book while she and her publishers got all the rest and it was overpriced for a novella) and again, Rowling actually cared about the work being GOOD. Because Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows was an awesome book, no matter what people have to say about the camping because even the camping had character stuff in it and a POINT. So ask you now, who is the greedy one?
So in more of Meyer's lazy and sloppy writing she contridicts one of the main things driving Jacob and the wolves' mythology. Yet it's treated as no big deal as these aren't Bella or the Cullens. Nice.
Then Irina starts apologizing and I'm seeing where this is going quickly. Big shocker, the Volturi kill her in their warped version of justice. Caius just killed her though, hoping to make Kate and Tanya attack him and start a battle. Unfortunately, they get stopped by the always so right Cullens. Any hope of any excitement at all is quickly diminished. Then hey, the egyptian clan is back! They back up the Cullens claims. It pretty much turns into more "Renesmee is awesome! Don't kill her!" stuff that I'm getting pretty tired of.
Then suddenly those old vampires start a cliche speech about using the super amazing cullens as an example and revolting agianst the Catholic Church-I mean the Volturi. Then it's suddenly the Cullens are innocent but now we have a war and then there's MORE counsel among the Volturi. There's quick and boring good byes for some reason among Bella and her crew. Then...something starts?
WORD LIST: specious, potency, melee, intrinsic
GENERAL ANNOYANCES: bad dialogue, lazy writing, Meyer debunking her own mythology for conveniance sake again.
NOTES/THOUGHTS/REACTIONS:
So now that Aro is Team Renesmee he does his best to get all the other Volturi on Team Renesmee as well. Lots of dissention fom mainly Caius who is obviously the one we're not supposed to like. He then points out the Cullen's alliance with the wolves. Good point. But then Meyer drops the bomb: they aren't actually werewolves, guys, they're shifters! What? Now Meyer isn't even trying. I can picture exactly how she's wrote this in her head:
"hmm...the alliance with the werewolves is a problem though...oh, I know! I'll make them NOT werewolves but shifters! That's so much cooler then werewolves! Oh, wait what if my fans question it? Oh, I'll put in this explanation of that their brains just decided on wolves so they've always been wolves! My fans will buy that. They've bought all my other stuff, haven't they?"
I'm telling you, that's how she wrote this whole damn book. She didn't care one lick about making it actually GOOD. She just cared about getting it done and getting more money for it. Yet people accuse JK ROWLING of being the greedy one. Rowling actually cared about writing decent material. Also Rowling donates millions of dollars to charity per year (I have yet to hear of Meyer donating to actual charities that didn't include her friends or that involved promoting her books). Rowling has written charity books that she made no money off of (that Bree Tanner book Meyer made money off of. Red Cross only got a dollar a book while she and her publishers got all the rest and it was overpriced for a novella) and again, Rowling actually cared about the work being GOOD. Because Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows was an awesome book, no matter what people have to say about the camping because even the camping had character stuff in it and a POINT. So ask you now, who is the greedy one?
So in more of Meyer's lazy and sloppy writing she contridicts one of the main things driving Jacob and the wolves' mythology. Yet it's treated as no big deal as these aren't Bella or the Cullens. Nice.
Then Irina starts apologizing and I'm seeing where this is going quickly. Big shocker, the Volturi kill her in their warped version of justice. Caius just killed her though, hoping to make Kate and Tanya attack him and start a battle. Unfortunately, they get stopped by the always so right Cullens. Any hope of any excitement at all is quickly diminished. Then hey, the egyptian clan is back! They back up the Cullens claims. It pretty much turns into more "Renesmee is awesome! Don't kill her!" stuff that I'm getting pretty tired of.
Then suddenly those old vampires start a cliche speech about using the super amazing cullens as an example and revolting agianst the Catholic Church-I mean the Volturi. Then it's suddenly the Cullens are innocent but now we have a war and then there's MORE counsel among the Volturi. There's quick and boring good byes for some reason among Bella and her crew. Then...something starts?
WORD LIST: specious, potency, melee, intrinsic
GENERAL ANNOYANCES: bad dialogue, lazy writing, Meyer debunking her own mythology for conveniance sake again.
BREAKING DAWN: Chapter 36-Bloodlust
CHAPTER SUMMARY: They gather for a battle that...doesn't happen.
NOTES/THOUGHTS/REACTIONS:
We open with vivid description as the Volturi arrive. For some reason as she describes this, I keep thinking of the scene in wraith rider music scene from the Lord of the Rings movie. It makes it much more entertaining. Edward's deux es machina mind reading ability tells us that they did in fact come to destroy no questions asked. Personally I'm all for this, it would be nice finally have some mass destruction in this book. Plus, I hate all the characters so I wouldn't care if any of them bit the dust.
For some reason, Bella becomes absolutely positive they're going to lose. Don't know why she comes to this conclusion, it actually looks like an even fight to me, but she comes to it anyway and becomes furious over the idea and throws the vampire equivolent of a temper tantrum and starts growling. It'll be interesting to see Kristin Stewart try and do this on screen. Bet it'll be hilarious.
Then there's a lot of...wait for it...standing around anxiously. Um...huh? Meyer, I know you can't see R rated films but there are plenty of pg-13 battle movies out there. Watch them please. THAT'S a battle and cause for excitement. Not...whatever the hell THIS is.
To make matters worse, Aro and Carlisle start speaking in that ridiculous dialogue that Meyer has Aro use. People don't generally talk before battles. Certainly not this reasonably. So they start to argue about Renesmee. Then Irina (who is conveniently there) steps forward and they interrigate her.
Then Aro calls Edward forward for some reason or other and this for some reason freaks Bella out and she throws up her stupid love shield that conveniently now works at will for her. Edward and Aro have a conversation we can't hear (thank god) and then Aro asks to see Renesmee. Well, we all know what will happen now, don't we?
Bella brings Renesmee forward. They of course take the time to praise how awesome a vampire she is. UGH. Renesmee speaks to Aro. He of course immediately falls in love with baby Mary Sue. Then he leaves with the others to discuss things.
So I ask you Twihards in case you have an explanation for this BS: WHAT WAS THE POINT OF THIS WHOLE DAMN BOOK?! It wasn't to watch Bella struggle with her new life with Edward because she HAS no struggle. It wasn't to fight the Volturi because THERE IS NO FIGHT. So what was the freaking point?! Other then to make more money off of gullible teenagers? No wonder fans revolted against this. I'm not even a fan of Twilight and I feel cheated by this book. I can't imagine how an actual fan of the series felt when they read this crap. Meyer has some nerve wondering why fans were so mad at her too. Really, why do you THINK?
WORD LIST: cudgel
GENERAL ANNOYANCES:
They came with pageantry, with a kind of beauty.-Fragment sentance. Fix. Also it is not a paragraph so there shouldn't be an indent. In fact, you're better off cutting it all together.
This whole chapter is basically one big cop out because Meyer has no guts and can't write violence.
NOTES/THOUGHTS/REACTIONS:
We open with vivid description as the Volturi arrive. For some reason as she describes this, I keep thinking of the scene in wraith rider music scene from the Lord of the Rings movie. It makes it much more entertaining. Edward's deux es machina mind reading ability tells us that they did in fact come to destroy no questions asked. Personally I'm all for this, it would be nice finally have some mass destruction in this book. Plus, I hate all the characters so I wouldn't care if any of them bit the dust.
For some reason, Bella becomes absolutely positive they're going to lose. Don't know why she comes to this conclusion, it actually looks like an even fight to me, but she comes to it anyway and becomes furious over the idea and throws the vampire equivolent of a temper tantrum and starts growling. It'll be interesting to see Kristin Stewart try and do this on screen. Bet it'll be hilarious.
Then there's a lot of...wait for it...standing around anxiously. Um...huh? Meyer, I know you can't see R rated films but there are plenty of pg-13 battle movies out there. Watch them please. THAT'S a battle and cause for excitement. Not...whatever the hell THIS is.
To make matters worse, Aro and Carlisle start speaking in that ridiculous dialogue that Meyer has Aro use. People don't generally talk before battles. Certainly not this reasonably. So they start to argue about Renesmee. Then Irina (who is conveniently there) steps forward and they interrigate her.
Then Aro calls Edward forward for some reason or other and this for some reason freaks Bella out and she throws up her stupid love shield that conveniently now works at will for her. Edward and Aro have a conversation we can't hear (thank god) and then Aro asks to see Renesmee. Well, we all know what will happen now, don't we?
Bella brings Renesmee forward. They of course take the time to praise how awesome a vampire she is. UGH. Renesmee speaks to Aro. He of course immediately falls in love with baby Mary Sue. Then he leaves with the others to discuss things.
So I ask you Twihards in case you have an explanation for this BS: WHAT WAS THE POINT OF THIS WHOLE DAMN BOOK?! It wasn't to watch Bella struggle with her new life with Edward because she HAS no struggle. It wasn't to fight the Volturi because THERE IS NO FIGHT. So what was the freaking point?! Other then to make more money off of gullible teenagers? No wonder fans revolted against this. I'm not even a fan of Twilight and I feel cheated by this book. I can't imagine how an actual fan of the series felt when they read this crap. Meyer has some nerve wondering why fans were so mad at her too. Really, why do you THINK?
WORD LIST: cudgel
GENERAL ANNOYANCES:
They came with pageantry, with a kind of beauty.-Fragment sentance. Fix. Also it is not a paragraph so there shouldn't be an indent. In fact, you're better off cutting it all together.
This whole chapter is basically one big cop out because Meyer has no guts and can't write violence.
BREAKING DAWN: Chapter 35-Deadline
CHAPTER SUMMARY: Meyer wastes readers time with details that we don't care about.
NOTES/THOUGHTS/REACTIONS:
We open with a sappy moment between Edward and Bella ("hurry back to me"? Really?) and she leaves wondering if he knows her plans. Again, Mark from Mark Reads Twilight said it best when he said this a perfect example of why these two are NOT a good couple. Because if their relationship is so good, why is she sneaking around and worrying about him finding out? That doesn't shout healthy relationship to me. That shouts trust issues galore on his part and definitely on hers.
Bella babbles to herself as she drives and I really don't care about all the probably incorrect assumptions she makes about Jenk's character after one meeting. We get more "Bella's so beautiful now she's a vamp!" right before she goes to meet Jenks (the clerk gawks at her and Bella enjoys it; no we're not shallow at ALL). She meets up with Jenks and they have the most boring conversation that is littered with bad dialogue as well. The entire purpose is just so he can hand her the documents. We waste THREE/FOUR PAGES ON THIS ALONE. He couldn't have just sent them to her in an envelope? Really, Meyer? I know you're out of ideas but good god, woman.
Anyway, she goes home documents in hand. Then what follows is a lot of dumb assuming on Bella's part. I'm sorry, why doesn't she, oh I don't know ASK JACOB AND EDWARD?! Why are we wasting time on this stupid plot idea? All she would have to do is hand the documents over to Jacob and say "here, had these drawn up just in case things go bad" and then they could make plans together. Edward probably wouldn't object, seeing as how it's about his DAUGHTERS SAFTEY. But that would easy and logical and hit home just how stupid this all is so Meyer instead has Bella make a big ridiculous production out of all of this and waste not only the reader's time (the reader probably doesn't care about this at all) and paper.
The rest of the chapter is just as pointless really. Basically Bella summarizes boring events that the readers don't care about. There's commentary on the weather and daily routines, much "I love yous", Bella tells Renesmee to run when she says so. Blah, blah, blah DON'T CARE. Then there's much vivid description of all of them gathering around the field and waiting for the Volturi. Seriously, most BORING BOOK EVER to involve vampires and werewolves.
WORD LIST: purveyor
GENERAL ANNOYANCES: pointless chapter is pointless
NOTES/THOUGHTS/REACTIONS:
We open with a sappy moment between Edward and Bella ("hurry back to me"? Really?) and she leaves wondering if he knows her plans. Again, Mark from Mark Reads Twilight said it best when he said this a perfect example of why these two are NOT a good couple. Because if their relationship is so good, why is she sneaking around and worrying about him finding out? That doesn't shout healthy relationship to me. That shouts trust issues galore on his part and definitely on hers.
Bella babbles to herself as she drives and I really don't care about all the probably incorrect assumptions she makes about Jenk's character after one meeting. We get more "Bella's so beautiful now she's a vamp!" right before she goes to meet Jenks (the clerk gawks at her and Bella enjoys it; no we're not shallow at ALL). She meets up with Jenks and they have the most boring conversation that is littered with bad dialogue as well. The entire purpose is just so he can hand her the documents. We waste THREE/FOUR PAGES ON THIS ALONE. He couldn't have just sent them to her in an envelope? Really, Meyer? I know you're out of ideas but good god, woman.
Anyway, she goes home documents in hand. Then what follows is a lot of dumb assuming on Bella's part. I'm sorry, why doesn't she, oh I don't know ASK JACOB AND EDWARD?! Why are we wasting time on this stupid plot idea? All she would have to do is hand the documents over to Jacob and say "here, had these drawn up just in case things go bad" and then they could make plans together. Edward probably wouldn't object, seeing as how it's about his DAUGHTERS SAFTEY. But that would easy and logical and hit home just how stupid this all is so Meyer instead has Bella make a big ridiculous production out of all of this and waste not only the reader's time (the reader probably doesn't care about this at all) and paper.
The rest of the chapter is just as pointless really. Basically Bella summarizes boring events that the readers don't care about. There's commentary on the weather and daily routines, much "I love yous", Bella tells Renesmee to run when she says so. Blah, blah, blah DON'T CARE. Then there's much vivid description of all of them gathering around the field and waiting for the Volturi. Seriously, most BORING BOOK EVER to involve vampires and werewolves.
WORD LIST: purveyor
GENERAL ANNOYANCES: pointless chapter is pointless
Thursday, December 16, 2010
BREAKING DAWN: Chapter 34-Declared
CHAPTER SUMMARY: Cullens celebrate christmas and big battle is planned. Amen.
NOTES/THOUGHTS/REACTIONS:
Bella comes home and much sappyness occurs. Blah.
Then more prattling/summarizing from Bella. What annoys me is that Bella is basically being a martyr again and assuming Jacob and Renesmee will be the only ones to survive. Where exactly did she get this idea? From what I've seen, the Volturi don't have many members, the Cullens on the other hand have a literal ARMY on their hands. So WHY is she so sure they'll lose? They've won so far, haven't they? Plus they have the werewolves who are the only known creature to be able to take down vampires, right? You'd think she'd be a little more confident. But it wouldn't be Bella and Twilight if she didn't act like a damn martyr at least ONCE. Now, it's twice per book. Groan.
The book becomes oddly fitting for this time of year as suddenly they are celebrating Christmas (already? Didn't they have the wedding like a month after graduation? Then Nessie a week later...how much freaking time has passed?! I don't even know!). Of course, it's a great christmas. I'm further shocked at the mention of a MP3 player in this. So they DO exist here! Creepily enough, Jacob gave Renesmee a promise ring. I'm sure that again, Meyer thought this was super cute. I think it's gross cause she's SEVEN YEARS OLD. Another thing: I'm pretty sure Native Americans don't celebrate Christmas, seeing as how that's a CHRISTIAN holiday, so why is the wolf pack even there? I smell lack of research and ignorance again. However, I could be wrong about this as I don't really know any Native Americans. If someone would care to correct me then please go ahead and feel free to ignore this bit.
But even the Christmas holidays are ruined by sad panda Bella who just can't freaking enjoy herself for once. They return home to find Alistair gone and everyone freaked out. Is it a bad sign that I'm racking my brain to remember who Alistair is and why he's so important? He basically left because he felt it was no use. His leaving causes Amun and Kebi (egyptian vamps) to leave but be mad when one of them stays to help.
They start explaining that Alistair was muttering to himself and in that muttering he's worried that the Volturi will just not listen and kill them all anyway. I think it's pretty clear now who the Volturi represent: The Catholic Church. For those that don't know, the LDS loaths the Catholic Church. The Volturi are obviously the Pope and the Cardinals. Meyer, you are not as subtle as you think you are being. Hell, Pullman was more subtle in the His Dark Materials books about the Magistrate (for those that don't know the Magistrate in the books represent the Church and its oppressiveness; Pullman is an athiest btw) then you are being here and that's saying something.
Then suddenly there's talk about whether to fight or not. Um...I thought this had already been decided? Guess not. Well in a cliche move, all the present factions agree to stand with Carlisle. Saw this coming a mile away. No shock factor. Then it turns into a hunt and Bella angsting on the hunt. Then she's all "what if fail?!" blah blah and of course Eddiekins comforts her. Again, why do I CARE? I KNOW she won't fail it's MEYER writing this and it's BELLA. The good guys will win. Boring chapter ends. FIVE MORE TO GO!
WORD LIST: sancrosanct
GENERAL ANNOYANCES: BORING!
NOTES/THOUGHTS/REACTIONS:
Bella comes home and much sappyness occurs. Blah.
Then more prattling/summarizing from Bella. What annoys me is that Bella is basically being a martyr again and assuming Jacob and Renesmee will be the only ones to survive. Where exactly did she get this idea? From what I've seen, the Volturi don't have many members, the Cullens on the other hand have a literal ARMY on their hands. So WHY is she so sure they'll lose? They've won so far, haven't they? Plus they have the werewolves who are the only known creature to be able to take down vampires, right? You'd think she'd be a little more confident. But it wouldn't be Bella and Twilight if she didn't act like a damn martyr at least ONCE. Now, it's twice per book. Groan.
The book becomes oddly fitting for this time of year as suddenly they are celebrating Christmas (already? Didn't they have the wedding like a month after graduation? Then Nessie a week later...how much freaking time has passed?! I don't even know!). Of course, it's a great christmas. I'm further shocked at the mention of a MP3 player in this. So they DO exist here! Creepily enough, Jacob gave Renesmee a promise ring. I'm sure that again, Meyer thought this was super cute. I think it's gross cause she's SEVEN YEARS OLD. Another thing: I'm pretty sure Native Americans don't celebrate Christmas, seeing as how that's a CHRISTIAN holiday, so why is the wolf pack even there? I smell lack of research and ignorance again. However, I could be wrong about this as I don't really know any Native Americans. If someone would care to correct me then please go ahead and feel free to ignore this bit.
But even the Christmas holidays are ruined by sad panda Bella who just can't freaking enjoy herself for once. They return home to find Alistair gone and everyone freaked out. Is it a bad sign that I'm racking my brain to remember who Alistair is and why he's so important? He basically left because he felt it was no use. His leaving causes Amun and Kebi (egyptian vamps) to leave but be mad when one of them stays to help.
They start explaining that Alistair was muttering to himself and in that muttering he's worried that the Volturi will just not listen and kill them all anyway. I think it's pretty clear now who the Volturi represent: The Catholic Church. For those that don't know, the LDS loaths the Catholic Church. The Volturi are obviously the Pope and the Cardinals. Meyer, you are not as subtle as you think you are being. Hell, Pullman was more subtle in the His Dark Materials books about the Magistrate (for those that don't know the Magistrate in the books represent the Church and its oppressiveness; Pullman is an athiest btw) then you are being here and that's saying something.
Then suddenly there's talk about whether to fight or not. Um...I thought this had already been decided? Guess not. Well in a cliche move, all the present factions agree to stand with Carlisle. Saw this coming a mile away. No shock factor. Then it turns into a hunt and Bella angsting on the hunt. Then she's all "what if fail?!" blah blah and of course Eddiekins comforts her. Again, why do I CARE? I KNOW she won't fail it's MEYER writing this and it's BELLA. The good guys will win. Boring chapter ends. FIVE MORE TO GO!
WORD LIST: sancrosanct
GENERAL ANNOYANCES: BORING!
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