BREAKING DAWN: Chapter 6-Distractions

CHAPTER SUMMARY: Bella and Edward chat and have sex. Pretty much it.

COMMENTARY/THOUGHTS/REACTIONS:
How on earth did Meyer get this past her publisher? Really, HOW? This is possibly the most pointless writing in existance. You remember how everyone bitched about the first half of Harry Potter 7 being dull? THAT was more interesting than this crap. I mean at least there Rowling put in backstory, had interesting tales, and actual plot developement. It has been SIX CHAPTERS and this plot has not once moved forward (and no, Bella and Edward getting married is NOT a plot developement) It's like a little hiccup of exposition. I'm seriously wondering if that Literature degree Meyer has is legit because I find it hard to believe that any student of literature/english could sit there and write boring/pointless crap like this and call it GOOD writing (never mind that she tries to call this literature to which I laugh at. Loudly).
Okay, on with the chapter. Basically as I said, there's a lot of painful dialogue in this chapter (that makes the writing in Avatar look Pulitzer Prize worthy, and please note I thought the Avatar movie's storyline was a joke. Beautiful movie, but bad story with respect to Cameron because I do think he's a good director, he's just a lousy writer). Then of course there's the ever constant summarizing. I'll be brief: Bella tries to seduce Edward into having sex again. He rebuffs her with stuff like snorkling/movies. This is frusterating to Bella who now thinks sex is the most wonderful thing ever.
This scenario annoys me greatly. Mostly because once again: it proves these two aren't equals. Edward is getting all the say in whether or not they have sex, though at least this time she tries to fight him on it. That's progress...I suppose. Then of course there's the rather sexist/anti-feminist viewpoint in here. Big strong/moral Edward (the man) is constantly harrassed by the immoral Bella who just doesn't know better because she's female (who you know are always the reason men go off and do things like have sex and affairs and drink and whatnot). And here was silly me thinking this attitude went out the window a long time ago. Guess not.
Somewhere in the bad dialogue the question of college is brought up and Bella thinks she wants to go which for some reason means she'll have to be human longer. I'm slightly confused about this. Why exactly must she be human to go to college? Dartmouth has night courses, I'm sure (most/all colleges do, especially the big ones). She can take night courses so she doesn't sparkle. I mean didn't Roselie and Emmett go off to College again in New Moon? So what exactly is the problem here? Why does she need to be human to go? And why does being a vampire mean she can't go? This "conflict" that Meyer is trying to create just doesn't jive and is frankly stupid. Meyer must know that to because as soon as it's brought up, it's solved a few pages later.
Talk then moves to more epic foreshadow. We get it Meyer. There will be a kid. Can we move on please? Also, no one dreams as much as Bella does. Seriously, this girl practically has a meaningful dream every freaking night. It's ridiculous and more instance of Mary Sueism. Hell, she even has ANOTHER dream this chapter (I think she has like three in this chapter alone) only surprise, this one is good (but she cries anyway). Edward comforts her, she throws herself at him, they have off screen sex. In the morning Bella is chastised (silly woman tempting her man with sex, how dare she) more disturbing dialogue about what survived the sex (somehow the bedframe broke...I don't want to know how) and talk of bruising and so on. Then at one point Bella asks Edward if he's mad they had sex. No. Really. She asks her HUSBAND if he's MAD that the two of them had (total willing) SEX. Just think about that for a minute and then come back to me when you've found logical arguements that say this is remotely healthy for any relationship.
More awkward bad dialogue and then the servants show up. Naturally they are a minority and we get racial stereotyping (incidently, Edward's Porteguese is described as "beautiful" while the actual native porteguese speaking people's talk is described as harsh. Think on that what you will). They clean while Edward and Bella cuddle and talk of future plans (Edward relents and lets her go to college; how generous of him) and then after they leave the two go off to have more off screen wild sex. Have I mentioned this book is BORING?

WORD LIST: none for this job, go Meyer!
GENERAL ANNOYANCES: BORING!