This chapter opens to Bella discovering to her horror that it has snowed. Again.
WHINE #18: More snow. It'll make me look like a bigger klutz then I am.
We then see Bella go through her thrilling morning routine as she thinks about stuff. Now during this, one word pops out at me: aloneness. At first, I didn't think it was a word and Meyer had goofed again, but according to Webster it is. So I will leave Meyer alone on this one. However, in the case it is used, solitude would have been a more appropriate word I think.
Bella also of course thinks about Edward and notes how obsessed she is already. She also notes that it is probably stupid so at least she REALIZES that obsessing over a boy she hardly knows is stupid. Maybe there's hope for this girl.
Cut to Bella having a klutzy moment outside and due to this she's now certain that she's going to have a horrible day. She clearly has never heard of optimism before. Then as she drives, Bella thinks about how it is strange that two boys like her when she was not liked this much back at her old school. THANK YOU she points out her own Mary-Sue characteristics. Maybe there'll be actual depth to this story after all? Oh no, Meyer now puts in an explanation for it and once again, it's the small town excuse:
Perhaps it was because I was a novelty here, where novelties were few and
far between.
From Twilight, page 55
If you're wondering about that sound, that was my head hitting my desk. Meyer, STOP USING THIS EXCUSE! Especially since it's obvious you've never been to a small town before. Also Bella, get the hell over yourself. You are not that interesting to these poor hicks. Give me a break.
We get to school and Bella sees that Charlie has put chains around her truck tires. How Bella didn't feel the chains as she was driving is beyond me, but I'll let it slide. This brings me to the one thing in this book that I kind of do like: Charlie.
Charlie is an awesome dad. Or as awesome as he can be considering he's never had the chance to be a proper father. He clearly supports Bella when he actually does not have too. He takes this girl in, gives her a free truck, and later lets her date Edward even though it's clear he's not comfortable with the idea. Bella? Appreciates NONE of it. She is actually surprised when he does things like this and I don't understand why because it's pretty clear in the first few chapters that he's a stand-up guy. Renee was pretty stupid to let him go just because she didn't like where he lived. So I will give awesome character points for Charlie. But he is one of the very few things I like about this series.
Then comes an actual exciting part in this book. Bella almost gets hit by a van. Is it bad that I was kind of disappointed that it didn't happen and or that the incident didn't make Bella wake up and realize, "life's short, I should probably appreciate the awesome life I have"? That's a bad sign when you WANT the heroine of the story to get hit. I was under the impression that you are supposed to root for the main character of a story, right?
But since there are a gazillion more pages to go, Bella obviously makes it through because Edward naturally saves her in the nick of time. Stupid Edward. Should have let her be and then the series would have been over. Oh well.
So the van turns out to be a convenient (and rather dumb) way for Bella to discover that there is not something quite right with that Edward boy. Because you know, the pale skin and changing eye color weren't enough clues. I have several problems with the van scene but my first major one is WHY DID BELLA NOT GET OUT OF THE FREAKING WAY HERSELF?
She clearly heard the van in time, she saw that it was swerving towards her but instead of I don't know, getting the hell out of dodge, she takes the moment to stare at Edward Cullen. Can we say stupid heroine? Show of hands girls (or boys), how many of you would stare at a complete stranger or any person as a van is skidding towards you? None? I thought so. So either Bella is extremely slow or this is another instance of Meyer not thinking things through. Which is reason number three on my list for not liking Twilight: Lack of Logic. This is only the first instance of lack of logic. Read on to other chapters for more instances.
So naturally Edward saves Bella (again, BOO) and she is surprised that she is actually hurt. I am too, Meyer didn't strike me as the kind to actually hurt her Mary-Sues. Maybe there's hope for this series? Bella though, is more concerned with Edward and is mad when he won't answer any of her questions. Yes Bella, you just met this boy yesterday and he has the nerve to not tell you his deep dark secrets yet. How dare he.
She is naturally even more upset when people force her to go through the hospital because they actually care about her wellbeing after she was nearly hit by a car. This starts a series of whines for our poor Bella.
WHINE #19: I had to ride to the hospital in a STRETCHER. So unfair.
WHINE #20: They made me wear a NECK BRACE.
WHINE #21: I had to be rolled into the hospital like some LOSER.
Bella ends up sharing a room with the boy who nearly hurt her and he is apologizing right and left and Bella has to sigh because it's clear that she now has another boy who has the hots for her. It couldn't at all be because he's freaked that he nearly killed a person. Nope. He's obviously in love with Bella and it annoys her to no end. I'm calling a Mary-Sue alert here. It annoys Edward too because he basically ignores him.
We then conveniently get to meet Doctor Cullen and I have to point out this sentence:
He was young, he was blond...and he was handsomer than any movie star I'dHandsomer, Meyer? Really? Say that sentence in your head please. Doesn't sound right does it? Maybe because once again, you've used the wrong word in your quest to make yourself look like a literary author. Hansomer is not the right word to use here. PLEASE EDIT. Also, Gary-Stu points for Doctor Cullen who is young and handsome and a doctor and rich of course. Also everyone at the hospital loves him too.
ever seen.
From Twilight, page 61
More Mary-Sue points for Bella too because everyone at school skipped class to make sure she was okay. She is of course mortified by this.
WHINE #22: All these people are acting so concerned about my welfare. IT'S ANNOYING.
Bella continues to question Edward and he continues to be annoyed by her questions and in this converstion we get this:
"I don't owe you anything."As aggravating and condescending Edward is being in this chapter, he makes a good point here. He doesn't even know Bella. They have just met. Therefore he doesn't owe her anything and she has no right/reason to be upset that he isn't spilling his deep dark secrets to her.
Edward, from Twilight, page 64
Bella is later sent home where she is further annoyed by parental units and she starts to dream about Edward.
WHINE #23: Charlie had the nerve to tell my MOTHER about my almost accident. Now she's annoying me with her worries.
WHINE #24: Charlie is worried about me too. It's so annoying.
WORDS A TEENAGER WOULD NEVER SAY: disconcerting, simultaneously, providentially, handsomer
MARY-SUE/GARY-STUISMS: Doctor Cullen-I am young, handsome, rich, and a doctor. Naturally the whole hospital loves me.
The whole school (or a majority of it) turn up to make sure Bella is okay, because class is dumb.
MEYER CONTRIDICTION: Bella says she doesn't like to lie. Yet she's been lying to basically everyone about how she actually feels since she got to Forks.
BOOK THAT IS BETTER: Anything by Tamora Pierce. She has two series, the Tortall series and the Circle of Magic series. Each is brilliant though I'm partial to Circle of Magic.
WHY THEY ARE BETTER: THESE are characters. They have stuff thrown at them, they have to work hard, and they CHANGE. It is also well researched and thought through. Pierce has created worlds that you have no problem believing. She's given them history, depth and a wide range of characters that are interesting and that you grow to care about. Also, THESE are kick-ass heroines. Nothing at all like whiny Bella-Sue.
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